Buckle. The fuck. Up.

Michael Parisi - Anti-fascist and proud

Iran has just ordered Saudi Arabia, Qatar, and the UAE to evacuate their energy facilities. The missiles are coming. They named the fucking targets on live television.

This is what 5D chess looks like when Donald Trump plays it. The guy walked up to the board, threw his queen straight into the middle, and got taken by a fucking pawn. And now he's sitting there telling everyone he's winning while the board is on fire and the table is collapsing.

Israel, with full US backing, bombed Iran's South Pars gas field today. The largest gas field on Earth. 70% of Iran's domestic gas supply. Shared with Qatar. All burning. And Iran's response? Cool, we're going to blow up every refinery from Riyadh to Doha. Here's the list. You've got a few hours. Run.

Now let's talk about oil. Because you're being lied to.

The headlines say Brent crude is at $103, $108. That is not the real fucking price. That's one benchmark. The actual aggregate global oil price, what people are really paying for crude right now, is sitting between $120 and $130 a barrel. That's the number they don't put on the front page because it would start a fucking panic.

Iranian officials have said openly they will push oil to $200. An Iranian economics professor said $300. Three weeks ago that sounded insane. Today it sounds like a fucking calendar reminder.

The IEA just confirmed this is the largest supply disruption in the history of the global oil market. The largest. Ever. Gulf production has been cut by 10 million barrels a day. The Strait of Hormuz is closed. A fifth of all the world's oil used to flow through there. Used to.

And here's what $200 oil means for you personally.

97% of everything you touch, eat, wear, and use involves crude oil. Your food. Your medicine. Your plastic. Your fertiliser. Your transport. Your heating. Even your tomatoes from the farmers market. Grown with petroleum fertiliser. Picked by blokes who drove there in trucks made from crude oil. Delivered on diesel. Wrapped in petroleum packaging. That little sticker on the tomato? Petroleum.

When oil doubles, everything doubles. When it triples, civilisation starts to wobble. This isn't a recession. This is a fucking seizure.

You know what caused the Great Depression? Tariffs. Stock markets at all time highs. Reckless speculation. Sound familiar? We've got all of that. Plus an oil crisis that 1929 didn't have. This is the Great Depression with a turbocharger bolted to it.

And the slow-motion part is what kills you. This is one of those disaster movies where you see the shockwave rolling outward in slow motion. Glass shattering. Faces changing from confusion to terror. Everything stretching out in this surreal, horrible, beautiful slow-motion moment. That's right now. On every trading floor, every petrol station, every supermarket supply chain on Earth. The shockwave is moving. You can see it. And nobody can stop it.

Today alone, Israel ass@ssinated Iran's intelligence minister. Third senior official in two days. Iran fired multi-warhead missiles and cluster munitions at Tel Aviv. Two dead. The Bushehr nuclear plant took a hit. Dubai Airport got hit. The Australian base in the UAE got hit. Expats are fleeing Dubai on $250,000 private jets and abandoning their dogs in the fucking street.

Iran has spent 25 years digging tunnels, building underground drone factories, hiding missile launchers in caves along the entire coastline. America is dropping 5,000 pound bunker busters and Iran is still firing hundreds of drones and missiles every single day. You're not winning. You're punching a hornets' nest and bragging that the nest has a dent in it.

Meanwhile the Fed meets today and they're completely fucked. Can't cut rates because inflation is about to go nuclear. Can't raise rates because the economy is already cracking. Gold is at $5,000 an ounce. American petrol prices have jumped 86 cents in 18 days. That's not a spike. That's a vertical fucking line.

And we're only on Day 19.

This is what happens when 77 million people look at a convicted felon, an adjudicated r@pist, a twice-impeached insurrectionist who hid classified documents next to the shitter, and say yeah, give him the nuclear codes. What's the worst that could happen?

This. This is the worst that could happen.

Donald Trump didn't play 5D chess. He didn't even play checkers. He walked into the room, knocked the board off the table, shit on the floor, and declared victory. And now 8 billion people who never got a vote are going to pay for it at the petrol pump, at the supermarket, in their heating bills, and in their fucking retirement savings.

The wheels of disaster grind slowly. The bombs make the news but the economics make the history books. $200 oil doesn't kill you in a fireball. It kills you at the checkout.

Buckle. The fuck. Up.